My expat friends said it's practically a ritual. All young foreigners visiting Moscow cannot afford to miss two night clubs: one that actually has something worthy to offer and the other that is still around simply because of its legendary history.

So, a week after my arrival, I journeyed into the wild world of the Moscow club scene.

Good crowd, good vibe

Let's start on a positive note: Propaganda is impressive. For one thing, the entrance on Thursday night is free. My friends and I showed up early, and, after passing face control, entered the club.

The place satisfied most of the requirements on my list: The crowd had a good vibe, the prices were reasonable, the waitresses were friendly, and the ambience was clean. Although I was a bit disappointed that dancing did not start until midnight, my friends and I killed some time with fries, drinks and a delicious complimentary appetizer of salted bread with ketchup.

At about 11:30 p.m., the place started to fill up. A good-looking crowd packed the bar, waiting for the fun to begin. Gradually, the tables disappeared, exposing a good-sized dance floor that came alive with DJ Sanches electrifying the jam-packed club with a fantastic mix of house and techno.

As it turned out, arriving early had its advantages – soon after midnight a long line of clubbing enthusiasts formed outside. The music kept us on our feet while the crowd, though consisting mainly of tourists, appealed to our senses. Propaganda emanated confidence, and for a good reason: it has everything one would expect from a good club.

Depressing, dirty

By contrast, the infamous Hungry Duck does not.

The lamentations for its legendary heyday aside, the club, located on Pushechnaya Ul. was a depressing, dirty and overpriced establishment.

From my perspective, this club was a sad gimmick done in a terribly cliched way. Plus, I got ripped off. I hate getting ripped off.

I have heard various accounts about Hungry Duck's prices. Some say that women pay no cover charge on Ladies' Night, while others say girls pay 10 rubles at the door and get free alcohol until 11 p.m., or that they pay 50 rubles and get free alcohol all night. To take advantage of the discounts, I arrived precisely at 9:40 p.m. and paid 50 rubles, only to discover that a girl next to me paid 30 rubles.

In any case, the place was dreadfully empty upon our arrival. A couple of dozen trashy women lined the circular bar or lolled at the tables. Like in Propaganda, the interior was covered in wood, but here it did not seem nearly as classy. I was willing to forgive the ambience, but everything else deserves a scathing commentary.

Although it was 9:50 p.m., the bartender not only refused to serve free drinks but also failed to give a credible explanation. After a few minutes of cursing, I acquiesced. The drinks were expensive and bad. My friends complained about their beers, and the only advantage of my White Russian was that it had enough vodka to dull my anger at the DJ. He played the same N'SYNC song three times, as his vinyl kept skipping.

The music was pathetic. I felt sorry for the girls who had to resort to dancing with each other to the tackiest of American pop. Did these girls know that they were gyrating to techno-style Tom Jones? I suppose they were too drunk to notice. Unless, I thought, there was something else that drew them to Hungry Duck. By 11:30 p.m., when the club was packed, I realized what it was.

The "ingenious" plan that lured the crowd included a bunch of sexy male strippers dancing to terrible music. Most of the women seemed convinced they were also part of the strip show, while dejected-looking men groped for anything they could find.

The same routine was repeated song after song, as I silently prayed for the madness to stop. A stripper would get up on the bar, dance, and then pick one mediocre-looking female customer to pull her top off. This passes for entertainment? Apparently, it did because everyone seemed ecstatic. I think it was the exotic African stripper that really did the trick.

For me, the novelty wore off after the first song. I tried to figure out what compelled people to come back here.

The Hungry Duck may let me dance on its table tops (which I did), but that doesn't excuse its expensive, over-hyped and badly DJ'd presentation.

HUNGRY DUCK
9 Pushechnaya Ul.
Metro: Kuznetsky Most
Tel: 923-6158
Hours: 7 p.m. to 6 a.m.
Cover: 10 to 200 rubles

PROPAGANDA
7 Bolshoi Zlatoutsinsky Pereulok
Metro: Kitai-Gorod
Tel: 924-5732
Hours: Thurs. and Fri., 12 p.m to 6 a.m.
Sat. and Sun., 3 p.m. to 6 a.m.
Cover: 70 rubles